Forget the chocolate and socks. The success of a Secret Santa or White Elephant gift exchange shouldn’t be measured in heartfelt thought, tenderness, and selfless generosity. This is your chance to inspire shock and awe, and incite riotous laughter amongst your friends, family, and co-workers during one of the most stressful times of year.
And, for that, you’ve come to the right place. We’ve compiled a list of hilarious and distasteful gifts sure to embarrass, confuse, and titillate every unsuspecting recipient on your gifting agenda.
Human Organ Lunch Box
This is hands-down the safest way to transport liver and onions, pork butt tacos, kidney bean salad, and head cheese on rye.
We LOVE dogs, but they inevitably do naughty stuff and this is the best way to make them pay.
Even getting pulled over is fun when you retrieve your proof of registration and insurance from an evidence bag.
Never forget the perfectly calibrated recipe for maximum personal achievement with this Swanson Pyramid of Greatness mug.
The real Mona isn’t for sale, and DaVinci’s portrait of Salvator Mundi just sold for $450 million dollars, but we think you can swing this angry number.
Did we go too far? If giving these Secret Santa and White Elephant gifts is wrong, we don’t want to be right.
Did we not go far enough? We like your style. Go crazy and shop the entire collection.
Good tidings and much hilarity.